The Feral Truth About Resentment in Caregiving

The Feral Truth:

Sometimes you feel resentful. And that scares the shit out of you.

Because it shows up quietly.

Not all at once.

Not in some dramatic, obvious way.

Just little thoughts like:

“This is so much.”

“I can’t keep doing this.”

“I just want one normal day.”

And then immediately—

guilt.

Because how dare you feel that way when they’re the one who’s sick?

So you push it down.

Ignore it.

Pretend it’s not there.

Except it is.

And it leaks out in weird ways:

• irritation over small things

• frustration that doesn’t match the situation

• feeling like you’re trapped… even when you don’t want to be

  
  

That’s the part no one prepares you for.

That love and resentment can exist in the same space.

At the same time.

For the same person.

And it doesn’t cancel the love out.

It just means you’re carrying more than one person was ever meant to carry alone.

You didn’t sign up for this version of your life.

You adapted to it.

And adaptation isn’t graceful.

It’s messy. Emotional. Complicated.

Feral, even.

So if that feeling shows up?

It doesn’t make you a bad person.

It makes you someone who is:

overwhelmed

overextended

and still showing up anyway

And that matters more than the thought you didn’t want to have.

Yours in chaos,

~Kari, The Feral Caregiver